sometimes...

God,

 sometimes I'm just curious where I'm gonna be in 5, 10 years. I'm just curious, what your gonna do with this mess inside of me, with him, with me, with us together. I wonder, if there'll even ever be a "us", and I wonder, if not, why I met him. Why we fell in love, so hardly. but at times, im just curious, and i can't wait to see, because after all, i know, youre just gonna do the very best for us.

 but there are other times, when i simply don't wanna let go, no matter what, where all these feelings are so much stronger than being reasonable, realistic. when i feel like i love him so badly, and i couldn't live without him. and that hurts, because i have no clue, how and what it's gonna be.

 God, I ask you to take over!!

18.10.08 00:40

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